Assimilate or Face the Consequences

Two stories irritated me today. The first was about a woman who was denied a job because locks. Her supervisor considered locks to be an "extreme hairstyle." People who consider natural hair styles to be "extreme" our delusional. I wear an afro because that hair texture is what is dictated by my genetic code. There's nothing, odd, unusual or extreme about it. If our natural hair is extreme, so is our chocolate skin. However, it is our fault as African-Americans that this problem persist. We went through so much effort to forget about our afro hair in an attempt to assimilate that no one respects it as a racial trait. If we did not drop the ball in this area, deny someone of a job because her hair texture was not European enough would be seen as racist as telling someone that she was not light skinned enough to get a job. That's why I am so glad when I see other naturals. We must support natural hair to make America understand that our it is our genetic feature so that the discrimination and mockery of our hair will stop.

This derision of our features is in the same class as black face and is not acceptable.

The second unfortunate story I found today is regard's France's promotion of a bill the banning wearing a wearing a full Islamic veil in public. As I have said before, I believe that organized religion is detrimental and I would like to see it lose it's prominence, but this makes me sick. France has no right to deny people the ability to express themselves the way that they choose. These women are not hurting anyone, nor are they affecting anyone else by their choice of clothes. There is no excuse for this, and I hope it gets struck down. This is nothing but an out lash of hatred, but this is evident. The spokesperson for the president, Luc Chatel, said

"We're legislating for the future. Wearing a full veil is a sign of a community closing in on itself and a rejection of our values."

In other words, assimilate or face the consequences. Both of these stories are examples of people being threatened simply because others are different from them. Society must learn that just because someone does not conform doesn't mean they are automatically dangerous.

African-American Women and Dating Desperation

I cannot stand when African-American act so desperate on the internet. I feel so embarrassed. One can go online now to a plethora of blogs or YouTube videos can see countless AA women making slide shows and blog post expressing their devotion to men of other races. Do these women realize how they are degrading us. It is as if AA women are begging or pleading for any one love us, and it saddens me that we feel that we have to work so hard to get men to show us some attention. Furthermore, why don't AA women see that no one else is obsessing over us online at the volume that we do to others? If other men were so eager to start IR relationships with us, you wouldn't have to beg. This sort of behavior is nothing short of pathetic, and it needs to stop. It's only contributing to the destruction of our image.

Why do African-Americans Celebrate Mediocrity?

Yesterday, my college had an event that was supposed to commemorate the "Black high achievers" of the school. At first, I was elated. Society shines more light on AAs who do bad things rather than on those who work hard, so I was happy that the college took the time to praise those who did. So when I arrived at the school, I was immediately surprised by how many people are there. (Over 200 people showed up!) Since the name of the program was called "Black High Achievers," I expected the people on the President's list or, at the very least, the Dean's list to be invited. However, it seemed that every man and his brother showed up. Then later in the ceremony, the organizer of the event said that the ceremony was meant to recognize people with a GPA of 2.9 and higher. The rest of speakers went on and on about how hard we worked and so forth, but for the entire evening I was really ticked off. Here were AAs who were saying that for their own people, having a GPA of 2.9 is a high achievement! Instead of telling the students to get their act together and work harder, they praised them how they had arrived. How can we set the bar so for ourselves?! I have a problem with anyone who acts as if being mediocre is an achievement for AAs. You cannot praise someone for staying out of jail, taking care of their kids, etc., because that is what they are supposed to do. This only reinforces the mentality that it is our place to be subpar.

True Blood's Portrayal of African-American Women

For a moment, I was considering checking out the "True Blood" series, but gave up the idea after hearing about the African-American female character, Tara. I hated that she was simply an epitome of the trite AA woman stereotype: loud and rude, with no depth. Furthermore, I disliked how she was so readily and easily available for sex with the Caucasian male's character without any level of commitment, as if she wasn't worth having a real relationship with him. To compound matters even further the colorism in the casting of this woman was the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back. Every American knows that a light skinned, mixed, or Latina woman will be the first to be cast for an African-American woman role. However, this rule reverses if the character is stereotypical or otherwise obnoxious. True Blood stayed true to that rule. Apparently, the first woman wasn't Black enough to be "ghetto."

Here's the first woman cast:


Here's the second and final:

African-Americans embrace all that is negative and destructive

They walk down the path of self-destruction...obliviously?

I was reading Clutch Magazine and was struck by an article talking about a writer at Grazia Daily UK describing afros as "ghetto fabulous." I hate hate hate when the word "ghetto" is used as a synonym for African-Americans, and even though I felt motivated to lash out at Caucasian ignorance, I realized that we share a significant part of the blame. It has become part of our culture to embrace and internalize negativity. It is as if we have a campaign to "claim" everything that is bad. We were called "nigger,"so instead of stomping our foot down and proclaiming, "No, I am too a man" we feel the need to "take back" the word. American's dehumanization of us caused us to be in poverty, but instead of saying "I am going to fight out of this quagmire," we accept the ghetto as our home and see it as something to be celebrated. I searched "ghetto" under song title at EndlessLyrics.com and found 108 songs glorifying life in the ghetto! Dang, it's like James and Florida fighting their whole life to get out of the projects just for J.J., Themla, and Michael wanting to stay in. How African-Americans have become so content with being third class citizens is beyond unsettling. How can we get ahead when we glamorize poverty and crime--when we don't even see that we are in trouble in the first place? That is what separated the African-Americans in the 60s and earlier from us today. They recognized they were drowning and were desperate to know how to swim. People to day have their head underwater but are too ignorant to fight to keep their head above. It is as if we look at others, such as our president and the prominent figures in African-American History Month, and use them to delude ourselves that we have equal status. Is it that our eyes are so focus on the past that we cannot see where are today? Has the illusion of a post-racial America made us believe that we are at dead end-- that there is no more to achieve? And most importantly, how can we slap ourselves out of this fantasy?

Using Interracial Dating as a Weapon

As people don't seem to read my post, but are making assumptions, here's a note so I don't have to say this over and over. This post is about African-Americans, not just AA women (2) this is not an anti-IR post. (3) This is directed at those who IR date because they have problems with AA (wo)men.

A picture says a thousand words

I just heard of this book by CW today. The cover pretty much sums up the depths of self-hated to which we have sunken. It's no secret that there is a gender war of sorts in the African-American community. Scores of us are verbally destroying our Brothers and Sisters in order to justify why we want to date anyone who isn't of our race. However, people who do this fail to realize that no matter how much they deride African-American (wo)men, they are pretty much shooting blanks as far as their argument is concerned. Here's why:

1. Let's just be honest. You just see European as better.
What all of these arguments come down to is a denial of racial bias. Rather acknowledging that they simply have a bias to Europeans, they put the blame on all of those of the opposite sex, saying that their in inadequacies forced them to find a mate outside their race. But anyone who is not in denial can see straight through this. We were all raised in this Euro-centric culture, so we know how you think. We were all trained to judged things by how white they are and only stop doing this when we recognize our behavior and work to correct it. But until we do, we chase after what closely matches the standard. I mean really, why choose an African-American, who doesn't come close to meeting the European Standard, when you can get the genuine item? Those who do this do not want to recognize their behavior, so in order to cover up their biases, they say that the other gender is responsible for their malicious feelings.

2. We come from the same origin.
I never understood how someone could rant about how terrible all African-American (wo)men were when we are raised in the same environments. It is not as if African-American women and men were born and raised on different planets. We grew up together in the same communities and cultures, so the bad soil that turned one of us rotten must have done the same to the other. Therefore, you can't act like the other gender is evil but yours is an innocent angel from heaven.

3. What Makes You Think the EA's Want You?
When you have so many problems with African-Americans, what makes you think that European-Americans wouldn't as well? If you don't respect African Americans, don't expect European-Americans to either.

4. Who made European-Americans demigods?
How can one find so many faults with African-Americans, but none with European-Americans at all? These African-American (wo)men bashers act as if choosing a EA for a mate will give them a flawless relationship straight out of a Disney movie and make their life complete. Their elevation of EA's to god-like perfection just illustrates their poor view of AA's. Secondly, since they love to talk about how superior EAs are a choice for mates, one must wonder what they do when talks about racism roll around. After all, it appears that EA's have more interest in AA's welfare than we do ourselves. They really have nothing to complain about.

What's truly ironic about this picture
Each time I hear someone insinuate that European-American men are better, such as in the cover of this book, the irony just sickens me. The author of this book says, "Black men are continuously being taught to disrespect, dishonor, and disregard the Black woman. The ugly, heartbreaking results manifest themselves with the 'baby mama' epidemic, video vixen mentality, enabling, denial, and other self-defeating behaviors." I agree with that statement, but what makes her think that EA men don't do the same? If your own people don't value you, why would you think that others do? In addition, who do does she think taught AA men to treat us this way? Who does she think taught us that EA women were valuable and worth protecting and reduced AA women to worthless objects? Who perpetuated, and continues to do so, this unbalanced image of EA and AA women in the media:

Choose your loyalties wisely.

As far as AA women bashing goes, it is shameful that men would turn their back on the only ones who stuck by them after 400 years of going through pure hell. How can anyone say such nasty things about AA women when their own sister and even their own mother is one. It reminded of a passage from the Adi Granth that criticizes this behavior well if you put it into the context of AA women:

We are born of woman,
we are conceived in the womb of woman,
we are engaged and married to woman.
We make friendship with woman
and the linage continued because of woman...
we are bound with the world though woman.
We grow up stronger and wiser having drunk milk from the breast of woman.
Why should we talk ill of her,
who gives birth to Kings?
The woman is born from woman;
there is none without her.
Only the One True Lord is without woman.

Black and White: The Bias Ingrained in our Language

I was reading a book a couple of months ago that mentioned the biases in English. It pointed out how although most words relating to humanity are masculine (mankind for example), the vast majority of those words that are negative are attributed to females. Obviously, the biases in our language are impressed upon our psyche as well, as women are judged more harshly than men in society. The book didn't mention English's bias regarding race, but of course, one has to take this in account as well. Calling Europeans "white" and calling Africans "black" for a life time must lead one to associate the races with the attributes that the words carry respectively. With this in mind, I will post the definition of each (from M-W).

White: free from spot or blemish: free from moral impurity : innocent: not intended to cause harm: : favorable, fortunate: marked by upright fairness: of, relating to, characteristic of, or consisting of white people or their culture from the former stereotypical association of good character with northern European descent (I find it a bit curious how it says "former." They are still associated with good because of this.)

Black: dirty, soiled; thoroughly sinister or evil : wicked: indicative of condemnation or discredit; connected with or invoking the supernatural and especially the devil; characterized by hostility or angry discontent: of or relating to the African-American people or their culture

I refuse to believe that the words we use to describe good and evil everyday has no affect when we use those same words to identify ourselves. I'm not outright condemning the usages of the words black and white entirely, but I'm giving you something to think about. Honestly, however, I look foward to the day when such biased language is not used to describe races.